Alright. So we’ve reached my birthday. Today I turn the big 3-0. Thirty flirty and thriving. That’s what they say right? Well my thirtieth trip around the sun is off to a weird start. I mean who could have guessed when I started this that I would be cancelling Vegas and starting thirty mostly alone in my apartment? Definitely not me! It was all planned out, but here we are.
So what does thirty mean to me? What does it mean to anyone? And what am I leaving behind in my twenties?
It’s that last question that is the most important in my opinion. The habits and bad decisions that I made in my twenties that I’m definitely not going to miss. Don’t get me wrong, I had a lot of fun in my twenties. There was a lot that I think I got right in my twenties. But it was a time of figuring out who I am and who I want to be.
Some habits I will be trying to leave behind? How about trying to hard to get other’s approval. I think I’m going to dedicate my thirties to doing what feels right for me, not what I think will please everyone else. Or picking at my nails. Or over analyzing what I’m doing. I think I need to try to live more spontaneously.
Things I am going to try to do in my thirties are be better about standing in my light and being my most authentic self. And taking better care of myself mind, body, and soul. I’m going to chase my dreams and make some goals on how to get there. I am going to try to eat less popcorn and more kale. And most of all, I’m going to try all that life puts in front of me with more passion than fear.
And then there’s the big goals that I have for the next decade of my life. Things that I would love to do and really want to achieve, but also acknowledge that life throws curve balls and it might not be possible. I would love to be a mom, own a condo (I live in one of the most expensive cities in the world. It wont be a house for sure), be married, and have all the family things ironed out and laid before me. But above all of that, I want to be a better me. To wake up in the morning and have my routine down, to know where my career is headed, and to be well on my way to my goals there.
As I write this I’m realizing that I have a lot of work ahead of me to make my thirties everything I want it to be, so wish me luck! I may not have it all figured out, but at least I’m working on it.
So this week it’s been a bit of a step backwards in some of my goals. Houdini (my cat) had a major medical issue that had to be dealt with suddenly last weekend and it’s been a week of playing catch up.
My meditation practice has kind of fallen off a bit as a result. As has my yoga practice, or really my selfcare practice. I am finding myself become a bit wound up in taking care of everyone else and making sure they have what they need. This is both who I am and a little frustrating because I know that I need to take care of myself as well. I’ve said before that I am learning that self care isn’t a dirty word, and it’s been so difficult to go down this path and really discover who I am.
In good news, I have been using puzzles as a bit of a meditative activity. Something just peaceful and quiet where I can quiet the noise of my mind and be in the moment. That’s something that is important to remember about meditation. It’s less important to sit and do nothing than it is to give your mind a rest.
Being in isolation from the world is difficult. Being in isolation from the world while taking care of a sick cat is even more difficult. But, at the risk of repeating myself, it’s also the gift of time. And so far it hasn’t really been time well spent. I have so many things that I want to accomplish with this time and I haven’t really started any of it (except my puzzling). I almost feel like there is too much that I could be doing so I am going to break it down to 3 impactful things that I am going to do this week.
I am going to rearrange the office. This will let me go into the work week with a clean and organized space that is ready for me to work in.
I am going to meditate in some way 3 times this week.
I am going to do yoga 3 times this week.
I feel like if I can accomplish these 3 things this week, it will have been time well spent. Otherwise next week will feel just as long and drawn out as this past week.
How have you been keeping sane the last few weeks as the world has become more and more chaotic? Let me know in the comments! I’ll take all suggestions! And don’t forget to like and follow the blog if you like what you’re reading for future updates.
So far this week has been a bit of a crazy one. Work has me working from home so I’m spending a lot of time with the small ones (my 2 cats Gir and Houdini), and the mister. But being under pseudo self isolation has given me the gift of time.
Time to think and reflect. largely I have been using this time to really look at where I think I want to be in the next 10 years. This is an ongoing line of thought for me these days but I’m really trying to narrow it down. What are my goals for the next 5 and 10 years? What do I think I will be able to accomplish? What building blocks do I want to put in place to continue my growth? And then there is the reflecting time that I have been continuing to invest in. What do I think of the last 10 years? How have I fallen short of my expectations? And just as importantly, how have I exceeded my expectations? I’m really trying to make the most of this time ahead of me and plan for the big transitions ahead.
I’ve started actually taking this time to invest in myself and think about the big stuff in my life as well. Things like my spirituality and what that means to me. As I mentioned in another post, spirituality is something I’ve really struggled with but as I approach my thirties its felt really important to actually take some time to figure out where I sit with my spirituality.
It’s also given me time to think about short term goals. Like not going completely nuts being stuck in the house most of the day with limited human interaction. Yoga is going to be important as my usual routine with spin has been interrupted. I think I need to be doing yoga about 3 times a week, but its hard to know where to start with all the options out there for online yoga classes. If you know of any really great instructors doing youtube or similar, please let me know in the comments.
I also think I am going to double down on my meditation. I’ve got a ton of room to improve on my meditation practice (going from once a week to more than that shouldn’t be too hard right?). So wish me luck!
Well that’s pretty much it for this week. Hopefully next week is a little less of a crazypants time in the world. I’m really trying to be an optimist during this time, but it can be difficult with so much coming at you all at once. Hope you all are staying healthy and safe.