Love is Blind, But I’m Not – A Netflix Review

Recently I finished the first season of Love is Blind on Netflix. I’m a little late to the game but I have some feelings about the show, as a concept and the season itself.

Off the get go, I wasn’t sure I was going to buy into the whole premise of the show. I mean, you take a bunch of people, put them in pods to talk to each other, how deep are they actually going to go? And on top of that, why would any of them follow through with the weddings. It’s like The Bachelor but everyone wears blindfolds and straight jackets. But if there is one thing that Netflix knows how to do, its how to create a supremely bingeable TV show. I made it through the first episode, saw the “coming up this season” section and I was HOOKED!

Now full disclosure, I finished the season in 3 days. There is something that goes missing when you’re bingeing a show and you definitely don’t get quite as emotionally invested, but it still got me in the feels hard when we got to the weddings episode. And those CLIFFHANGERS! I mean, way to make me lose 4 hours Netflix. Of course I want to watch the next episode.

Winding it back a bit, I certainly thought that Carlton was hella full of himself the whole way through the pods. Major toolbag. But I definitely didn’t think he deserved to be treated so badly by Diamond when she confronted him the morning after his big reveal. I thought he was courageous in telling her about his sexuality and really made himself vulnerable in a way that wasn’t otherwise seen. That said, boy, watch your mouth and don’t call a woman a bitch in any way unless you’re ready to feel the wrath.

Did anyone else feel that the girls that they got on the show were gorgeous but the guys were mostly average looking? Like don’t get me wrong, there was something conventionally attractive about each of them, but none of them were wow’s for me. Just me? 🤷‍♀️

Now, my favourite couple hands down was Cameron and Lauren. When they got married, I teared up and cheered. I was rooting for them the whole time. I loved everything about them and loved how they communicated their way through all the little things that could have massively tripped them up. But the big thing I think is they both BOUGHT IN. They were in it right from the start and weren’t playing any games. Refreshing right?

Now, as far as the show itself, I thought there were a couple major things that left me with questions. Now my friend Braden likened the show to basically arranged marriage, and I disagree. The reason for that is that I feel that there was a high degree of choice to the show. No one had to accept a proposal, and no one was told that there was one right guy for them in the group. That said, I can see how someone could come to that conclusion. I felt like it cheapened the experience to have the Mexico trip be heavily relied upon to deepen the relationship in the way we all know they meant. Sex. But there can be more of a physical bond even without sex. It isn’t the only part of a physical attraction that is important for a relationship to be successful. I really felt this was where Jessica had it right not to jump into that part of the physical right away and try to let it happen naturally.

There were so many cringey moments that were captured, like any good reality TV show, but that just made it more intoxicating to keep watching. Like sitting there saying “no way he didn’t just say that” and watching on to see how it ends up. And yes Netflix, I am almost always still watching. Especially now. So can we please ease off the judgey reminders?

What did you think of the show? Haven’t watched it yet? I definitely recommend it! As always, hit that like button if you like what you’re reading and want more of it, and follow the blog if you want to keep up with the latest posts!

Much love
Sara

The Week of Weeks

So this week it’s been a bit of a step backwards in some of my goals. Houdini (my cat) had a major medical issue that had to be dealt with suddenly last weekend and it’s been a week of playing catch up.

My meditation practice has kind of fallen off a bit as a result. As has my yoga practice, or really my selfcare practice. I am finding myself become a bit wound up in taking care of everyone else and making sure they have what they need. This is both who I am and a little frustrating because I know that I need to take care of myself as well. I’ve said before that I am learning that self care isn’t a dirty word, and it’s been so difficult to go down this path and really discover who I am.

In good news, I have been using puzzles as a bit of a meditative activity. Something just peaceful and quiet where I can quiet the noise of my mind and be in the moment. That’s something that is important to remember about meditation. It’s less important to sit and do nothing than it is to give your mind a rest.

Being in isolation from the world is difficult. Being in isolation from the world while taking care of a sick cat is even more difficult. But, at the risk of repeating myself, it’s also the gift of time. And so far it hasn’t really been time well spent. I have so many things that I want to accomplish with this time and I haven’t really started any of it (except my puzzling). I almost feel like there is too much that I could be doing so I am going to break it down to 3 impactful things that I am going to do this week.

  1. I am going to rearrange the office. This will let me go into the work week with a clean and organized space that is ready for me to work in.
  2. I am going to meditate in some way 3 times this week.
  3. I am going to do yoga 3 times this week.

I feel like if I can accomplish these 3 things this week, it will have been time well spent. Otherwise next week will feel just as long and drawn out as this past week.

How have you been keeping sane the last few weeks as the world has become more and more chaotic? Let me know in the comments! I’ll take all suggestions! And don’t forget to like and follow the blog if you like what you’re reading for future updates.

Much love
Sara

The Romance Shift

This week I’ve been reflecting on relationships. Not just the romantic ones, but the friendships too (more on those later). As far as romantic relationships go, however, I’m what my friends have called a serial monogamist. I like being in a committed relationship. Don’t get me wrong, I’m totally happy on my own too (found that ability in my twenties), but there’s something really nice about having a partner in crime. But as I approach my thirties, I’m a little startled to see that the way I approach relationships, and how I exist in them, has changed in a big way.

In my early twenties I viewed a romantic relationship as something exciting yet comfortable. I was constantly in search of the “puppy love” phase but I also thought that it was important for me to be in a relationship constantly. I thought that was the big goal in life. You get in a relationship, fall in love, and then get married and your life really begins.

It seemed like a pretty linear way of living life. You go right from point A to B to C. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. If life worked like that, I always thought that I would be set and would hit all those milestones that I expected to hit by the time I was thirty. And maybe that works out for some people, but it certainly hasn’t worked that way for me.

Instead, I am finding relationships to be complex things where some days you fly and everything fits perfectly, but other times it feels like you’re working through every trauma of your past to get to the future you both want. It’s wonderful to have a partner beside you working for the same goals and striving for the same level of excellence. Its working through the fights to see the sun on the other side instead of calling it quits at the first sign of trouble. It’s trusting that the other person has your back when you may not have your own.

And I’m learning that life doesn’t begin and end because you’re in a relationship or not. Life is what happens around you as you choose your path, whether you have someone making footprints beside you or not. I’m learning that relationships don’t define who you are as a person but you are who define you and the relationship should compliment that. And that’s both empowering and frightening at the same time. It means that I have to decide who I am, even in a long term relationship.

Now those who know me know I’ve been with my partner since my early-ish twenties, so a lot of this learning has been done with him by my side. We have grown together and faced more than our fair share of bumps along the way. And things are complicated because of the amount of growing we’ve done together and separately. That growth hasn’t always been at the same rate or at the same time. But still we choose each other. And thats powerful.

I’m learning that relationships aren’t what happens when two people see each other in the right place at the right time, but rather that it is when two people choose each other every single day, despite all the other stuff that could get in the way. And when you stop choosing each other, that’s when the relationship ends, not when things get hard. And I’m learning that some days the odds are stacked against you, and others its a windfall in your favour. It’s rarely something in between.

What is your favourite thing to learn about your partner? How has your view on relationships changed over the years? Let me know in the comments! And don’t forget to like the post and follow to find out when I post next.

Much love
Sara

Whats The Point?

So lately I’ve been thinking about my purpose on this planet. And I think that’s something that a lot of people heading into their thirties think about and struggle with. I just wonder how far people are actually willing to deep dive into it.

So what is my purpose? Why am I here? It’s tricky. I feel like I’m here to help people and need to find a way to do that. But I also feel like I’m meant to be a mom in some way. Maybe the two things are combined? Is this my purpose?

But I really have more questions than I do answers at this point, and I’m fairly sure that this is part of a much larger conversation. I am trying to break it down and find the smaller portions of my purpose. I don’t believe that our purpose is any one thing, but rather a collection of a bunch of smaller things that all work together to make the greater picture. To break this down, I am going to continue to meditate and allow my intuition to lead me a little more than I have been. This will hopefully let my soul speak up and lead me down the right path in my life

Right now this is such a time of transition, and I definitely don’t think I have all the answers. In fact, I feel like I’m coming to this with more questions than I ever imagined I could have about life and the way I live. It’s such a strange place to be. Questioning everything is challenging and intense at times, but also, so far, very rewarding.

I need to challenge myself more though. I really want to take the time I have now (thanks COVID-19) and work out as often as I can, as well as take the time for me to figure all of this stuff out. It’s easy to ask the questions, but harder to find the answers.

Much love,
Sara

And So It Goes

Alright friends, its time for the weekly update.

So far this week has been a bit of a crazy one. Work has me working from home so I’m spending a lot of time with the small ones (my 2 cats Gir and Houdini), and the mister. But being under pseudo self isolation has given me the gift of time.

Time to think and reflect. largely I have been using this time to really look at where I think I want to be in the next 10 years. This is an ongoing line of thought for me these days but I’m really trying to narrow it down. What are my goals for the next 5 and 10 years? What do I think I will be able to accomplish? What building blocks do I want to put in place to continue my growth? And then there is the reflecting time that I have been continuing to invest in. What do I think of the last 10 years? How have I fallen short of my expectations? And just as importantly, how have I exceeded my expectations? I’m really trying to make the most of this time ahead of me and plan for the big transitions ahead.

I’ve started actually taking this time to invest in myself and think about the big stuff in my life as well. Things like my spirituality and what that means to me. As I mentioned in another post, spirituality is something I’ve really struggled with but as I approach my thirties its felt really important to actually take some time to figure out where I sit with my spirituality.

It’s also given me time to think about short term goals. Like not going completely nuts being stuck in the house most of the day with limited human interaction. Yoga is going to be important as my usual routine with spin has been interrupted. I think I need to be doing yoga about 3 times a week, but its hard to know where to start with all the options out there for online yoga classes. If you know of any really great instructors doing youtube or similar, please let me know in the comments.

I also think I am going to double down on my meditation. I’ve got a ton of room to improve on my meditation practice (going from once a week to more than that shouldn’t be too hard right?). So wish me luck!

Well that’s pretty much it for this week. Hopefully next week is a little less of a crazypants time in the world. I’m really trying to be an optimist during this time, but it can be difficult with so much coming at you all at once. Hope you all are staying healthy and safe.

Much love,
Sara

Keep Calm and COVID on

So let’s address the elephant in the room. There is a pandemic going on right now that is causing many of us to self isolate. In fact, that’s probably why you’re reading this now (or you like me! You really like me!). But anyways, while caution and following instructions are important, we really aren’t in the panic stage yet. Here’s what I mean:

People all over the country are stocking up at the moment (myself included to a lesser degree) but there are some who are going to great lengths to buy up a year’s supply in toilet paper. Fairly unnecessary and leaving those of us who actually need it without. I have 2 rolls left people, this is not a drill. So how am I spending my day tomorrow? Searching all over the city to try and find some toilet paper instead of staying safe in my apartment.

Next up: the employers who aren’t covering lost wages when they are shutting down unexpectedly. Here is something that really bothers me right now. I mean, if you’re a small business that’s one thing. I can understand a little more that you wouldn’t be able to handle the losses and cover the wages. But there are several larger companies (CoughFlamesOwnershipCough) who are instead insisting that they don’t need to cover the wages but will make a strong fuss about being supported by the community when the organization needs something. This is just wrong, and more people need to speak out about this. EI isn’t going to be able to cover everyone.

Much closer to home, a lot of theatre shows are cancelling or postponing. My own show had to make the difficult decision to postpone until the fall (hopefully) to do the responsible thing and not gather people unnecessarily. Its hitting hard. People are losing work, and not a small amount with all the corporate events being cancelled globally, there is a lot of technicians and designers who are going without work. Theatre companies are looking at huge losses. If there has ever been a time to support your local artists, here it is. But the theatre community is strong in its support of each other and I have seen people step up and offer assistance to those who may not have cushions to fall back on, the gathering of information for those who may need to apply to EI, and even just lending support and strength to the administrators who are having to make such difficult calls.

Amongst all of this craziness, I have seen some truly wonderful things happen as well. From housebound citizens in Italy singing with each other to keep up morale, to people within my own community offering to help the elderly and those who have compromised immune systems stock up on groceries and run errands to avoid public transportation. People are really stepping up, and that is what keeps me thinking that things are going to be alright.

So keep calm and healthy out there.

What has been your experience with COVID-19 so far? Are there any signs of wonderful humans in your life to share? Let me know in the comments! (And as always, click like and follow the blog to get the latest. It really helps me out!)

Much love
Sara

Spirituality vs. Religion

For a long time I have identified as agnostic. It’s been difficult for me to align myself with organized religion for a variety of reasons, which I won’t go into here. The moral of the story is I’ve struggled with my spirituality for some time now.

It’s only just been recently that I’ve started to think about the different kinds of spirituality that there is in the world. Something that has caught my attention has been astrology and human design. I think there is something worth investigating there, as they both are about the reason you are here right now. And that’s something that feels really powerful to me. Instead of a set of rules to follow or a belief of where you are going after you die, these forms of spirituality focus on your present life and making the best of the life you have. Be it explaining who you are (astrology) or WHY you are (human design).

Now I always thought of spirituality as something set in stone. You believed in God and thus were spiritual. Heaven and Hell, spiritual. Good and Evil, spiritual. The places the planets aligned at the exact moment you were born, well that wasn’t in my definition of what spirituality is. It was something you looked into for fun and you read your horoscope sometimes to see what someone thought your day was going to be like (usually in extremely generic terms). I definitely didn’t think you could be spiritual without believing in religion.

But looking at things from a broadened sense of what spirituality is has helped me frame what I believe in a little better. And its not something that I feel that I really was ready to explore before now, as I evaluate all parts of my life heading into my thirties. I still have a long way to go to know how much I hold in both astrology and human design, but I really feel like I’m on the right path.

Next stop is going to be getting my charts read by someone and really dig into what it means for me. I’m most interested in the human design chart as it explains things like what you are here to learn, or where you have the most room for growth. It’s meant to chart out in broad terms why you are existing now and I really think I could use some direction these days. It’s easy to feel lost, and I’m learning that a lot of people going through this big transition in life from their twenties to thirties start searching for direction, so i guess I’m right on track.

Do you know anything about astrology and human design? What are your thoughts on religion vs. spirituality? Let me know in the comments! And if you like what you’re reading don’t forget to follow my blog to catch the latest posts as soon as they’re out!

Much love,
Sara

To be or not to be… A roommates tale.

Lets talk for a second about roommates. I have had some monumentally crap ones. Like I have sworn off roommates for life.

I always thought growing up that having a roommate would be this awesome experience where you bonded and had chats in the hallway and hung out all the time. No one prepared me for how hard it can be to live with another human being who isn’t related to you or interested in sleeping with you. And twenties me has had a heck of a run in the roommates department.

Like, I had this one roommate who went so far as to spike tape out exactly where she wanted her stuff to go because she was convinced I was moving her stuff around. And she never cleaned up after herself. Like ever. But when we got fruit flies, somehow it was my fault.

Or a male roommate I had one time that was on drugs most of the time and brought strange women back to our house and left chewing gum all over the house on the walls. (Seriously do I know how to pick them or what).

I’ve had some good roommates too, ones who we did bond a little, and have fun together sometimes. Like once we had the power go out when I was living with 2 other girls and we just sat in our doorways talking for hours by candle light. Such an amazing time. But being together with a group of girls is wayyy harder than getting along with a group of guys. Girls are catty and weird with each other. There is definitely a vibe when you live with multiple girls.

And what about common areas? In my experience there has never been an equal use of common areas kind of situation. Someone always seems to rule over it and the other person simply spends all their time in their room.

Single living for life baybee!

Have I just had a bad run of roommates? Should I ever find myself in a situation where I might need one should I give it a shot? Let me know!

Much love,
Sara

Veggin’ out

So I’ve been a vegetarian for a long time. Like 16 years long. But I’ve never really evaluated what that means to me, or rather how far into my product and health that stretches.

Now, I’m not a vegan, and I still use honey, eat cheese, and occasionally eat eggs. But I choose not to eat gelatin (because eww). But I’ve never really investigated the prescriptions I take, or the vitamins I take. I’ve always chosen cruelty-free, and it’s something that is important to me, but how far do I take it? Do I refuse prescriptions because they have something animal based in them? Do I not take supplements for the same reason?

Now that I’m evaluating all of these things and really looking into better skin care and health strategies (see my earlier post in search of supplements) I kind of have to start thinking about where my morals lie. I still feel like cruelty free is important, but how do I work on getting extra collagen? And do I cut out capsules that are made with gelatin? I feel that prescriptions are an exception that I need to make from this as some things I just don’t have a say in. But what about the other stuff?

Twenties me would have been pretty staunch on not needing this stuff anyways and just neglected my health because of it, but I really want thirties me to give a crap about what my skin looks like, and what my health is doing. I’m definitely tired of being tired all the time.

Have some recommendations for vegan or vegetarian supplements or resources for me to start looking? Any answers to my many questions? Hit me up in the comments and let me know! And don’t forget to like and follow my blog to get the latest!

Much Love,
Sara

This is your life on Friends

Growing up, I was convinced that my twenties were going to be like Friends. Working a job, hanging with a core group of friends all the time, and chilling at our favourite coffee house. Living some kind of kooky special life where the greatest things had yet to come. Having exciting dating experiences that I would be able to laugh about with my friends.

Instead, what I got was vastly different. I worked a lot, hardly had any close girlfriends, and had a lot of weird times. There were a ton of great things that happened. I met my partner Patrick, I graduated university, I moved to a great new city, started and mostly ended a career, and now am starting a new one.

But it has definitely been nothing like I was led to believe on Friends.

Its been harder than I could have imagined. I couldn’t wait to be in my twenties when I was a teenager. That’s when things would really change and be awesome. Life would really start. But in a way it really has just been a continuation of my teens. I still have so much to learn, I still have a lot of challenges to face, and I still have so much more of life to experience.

I thought that once I was turning 30 I would be in such a different place in life. Married, kids, established career, those are the life milestones I always imagined that I would have hit by now. But being here now, I almost feel like I wasn’t even close to ready for those things by 27 or 28. Even now, I’m only just feeling ready to really entertain those things. Maybe thirties me will really be the best me. Maybe it doesn’t have to be a mourning of my twenties ending (though I can imagine there will be some drunk tears on my birthday) but rather a celebration of all that is yet to come.

Have you hit your thirties yet? Is it really all I hear? Let me know in the comments! I love hearing from you. (And as always, don’t forget to like and follow the blog to hear first when new posts go live.)

Much love,
Sara